Pastoral Exhortation - Series of 2011

A Call To Mothers

Written by Rev (Dr) Prabhudas Koshy Sunday, 08 May 2011

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This is an urgent call to all mothers to make sure that they are fulfilling their God-given role in the upbringing of their children. In these days, we are hearing more and more of juvenile crimes, teenage pregnancies, drug abuses, etc. And yet, we see an increasing number of children without constant parental care. It is very alarming. Though parents are not to be blamed for every sinful act of the children, they need to examine themselves to prevent rebellion in the children due to parental irresponsibility.

I would like to consider three cases cited below and advise all mothers what is the biblical attitude and actions you should take as mothers.

Case 1: From the earliest memories of him, he recalls his mum as one who came by in the evening to pick him up from the childcare centre. She told him to call her ‘mum’. At home she is very busy and often tired. His approaches were often seen as a disturbance. She would scream at him. He was forced not to express his desire for her attention.

Now at sixteen, he breaks the parents’ ‘curfew’ and stays out with his friends. He does not like to go to church where his dad and mum go every Sunday. Because he found acceptance and appreciation in a place where dad and mum do not go. He smokes. He is rude. He shouts at the mother. He frequently asks her for money. Sometimes, he brings home a girl to stay with him. One day when mother confronted him, he yelled, “You never understood me. You never listened to me. You were too busy. She is my friend and she is going to stay with me.”

Case 2: Here is another case: A teenage girl hearing the commotion in the parents’ room stood at the door to listen. She then overheard her mother’s yelling, “Enough is enough! I’m tired of you and the kids running my life. I have enough trouble of my own. You all go and die or get out of my life!” As she returned to her room, she wondered, “Have I been an unwanted burden to my mother all these years. Who can I expect to get love from this home?” Soon her frustrations find its outlet through rebellion.

Advice to mothers: Mothers, all are not well! You may never abuse your children, nor fail to provide food and clothes, but your self-oriented lifestyle will leave very dangerous negative impressions in the minds of your children. Is your life characterised by a preoccupation with your own job, interests and concerns? Is there a lack of motherly attention in the life of your children? Do you have time to figure out the child’s behavioural problems and then pray about it and to rightly deal with them?

A desire for better or luxurious lifestyle, boredom with homemaking role, and the pressure from the women’s movement have driven a great number of mothers out of their honourable and highly responsible motherly duties at home to places of work. Materialism and selfishness are destroying the unequal and all-important task of motherhood.

More and more mothers are opting to work by leaving the preschool children in various day care facilities. They are deprived of mothers’ warmth, listening ears, shoulders to cry on, watchful eyes that keep them from error and affectionate embrace. Mothers’ natural responses to children are just not coming to the aid of the children in their greatest time of need.

What else can this be, but the fulfilment of the biblical prediction concerning the last days that people will be “without natural affection” (2 Timothy 3:3). I have heard mothers saying, “I am not the kind who stays at home and look after the children. I hate children crying and disturbing me. I am an outgoing person by nature. So I rather keep away from my home and children.” These are the heartbeats of a new breed of mothers who have long forgotten the natural affection of a mother. Can a mother ignore the cry of her child? How can a mother pictures her home, nothing but a misery?

During the years of the child’s physical, mental and spiritual growth, a mother’s close supervision and care are very vital. Through continued teaching, intense loving care, correction and Christian influence, mothers can strengthen her child to grow in the right path. Whether it is preschool years or school-age years or teenage years, the watchful and loving attention of a mother is always important to the proper godly upbringing of the children. Motherly care is irreplaceable! That’s why the Apostle Paul exhorted the women, “To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed” (Titus 2:5). Naturally no one expects the babysitter or a childcare centre to give what the mothers alone can give.

Case 3, and advice to mothers: Now I call upon mothers who are always at home that you must make sure that your physical presence is a blessing to your children. It is possible that you can be at home and yet a million miles away from your children's need. Some mothers who are always at home get hooked to cleaning and decorating their homes, cooking, watching television, reading books and conveniently laying aside the care of the children. If you make no sincere effort to give your children the pure and powerful love of a godly mother, your home is no better than the childcare centres. It is expected by the Lord that you give all the best of motherly affection, nurture, correction, discipline and guidance to your children while you are at home. Therefore, prayerfully give yourself to the best upbringing of your children.

All dear mothers in Gethsemane, may God give you the joy and pleasure of serving Him by fulfilling your God-given motherly role. Your call from God unto motherhood is more significant than any other job in this world. So give a high level of commitment to the biblical pattern of motherhood that you may rightly fulfil your role as a godly mother. May God’s grace fill you to meet the challenges of motherhood.

Happy Mother’s Day!